This post will be random, but thought out–yet completely out in left field at times. This post is about 123423 put together to be one, but then cut in 1/8ths… We’ll see how far I can get.
First–This was my first Christmas working–ever. Fortunately my new small town service lets me have my wife here(and soon there will be family quarters with 2 bedrooms, a kitchenette and a living room with flat screen tv!) for most of the day. My Boss and his wife made Prime Rib roast for dindin, and my dad brought over some yummy turkey and fixins later in the night(while I was on a call…).
Today I had two calls–one Interfacility transfer, a psych from the VA to the Behavioral joint down the road. He was a very unhappy Schizophrenic man that thought I was the cop that brought him there. There wasn’t much sense in trying to convince him I wasn’t–when he knew that I WAS.
The second was a would be overdose that I may right about later. Ativan, abilify, zoloft and a megerie of other drugs made up the cocktail. Washed down with 3 or 12 beers.
She went unresponsive a few times and apneic twice. Nasal trumpet didn’t even elicit a painful response out of her…. but she would come back and tell me all about her day.
AD has a great post about "why we do what we do". I wanted to write more about it, and why I do what I do, but I have a post on it already…
Quoted below for good measure.
"Every Day some little old lady, or young kid we transport asks the same question during my small-talk sessions with our patients… "so why do you want to do this? Why do you want to be a paramedic?"
Most of the time it’s a little hard to just mutter out a response that isn’t clichéd. The "I like helping people" response is pretty common.
But its a lot simpler than that. It’s who I am. It’s what I am. This is me. I’ve worked on political campaigns–big and small. I’ve spent nearly a year with a Congressman 3 foot away from me. Spent time with more Presidential candidates than you could imagine, more business moguls and old money.
But none of that matters. In the end, win or lose–and I’ve had both–it didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel anything like giving 23 minutes of comfort to a 79 year old woman who just knew she was going to die. She knew it. I couldn’t do anything for her. My med bag, my gear only does so much. But I know that for that 23 minutes she was in my truck, she was relaxed. I got her joking. We talked about her grandkids–her husband’s business, everything.
That is who I am.
I won’t get rich doing this. Unless you ask Marty.
The book linked above is a book that we were required to read in one of my more bogus classes in college. Some places use it for management and team building, some use it as a motivational tool. Most people read it because someone told them to take the time. Whatever way it is, it relates a lot to the world we live in. We are rarely thanked, often forgotten, and only appreciated when needed. But simple things can make it all worth while. Every now and then we get a save. More often than not, we spend time comforting friends and family. Remember–often everyone in the room is our patient–most of them need something we don’t carry in our trucks.
Compassion.
There are going to be countless times in my career that I will be called to act selflessly. I hope I hold true to that. I want to be able to go home at night, look my wife in the eyes and be proud of what I do. I will not turn into a lollipop!
It’s not what I DO. It’s who I AM."
