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Do you Love your job?

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Seriously? Do you? This is a question my wife and I have been talking about for a while as she considering going back to school for various things. I know she doesn’t care for her job, but has always stayed because it pays well and we needed the money.

I switched jobs several times in a small time frame(and chronically through life) but have been with my current job for about 20 months. The pay leaves something to be desired… no seriously, but most of the rest of my job leaves me feeling satisfied. I am finally on a shift I like, get to see my family, and do a job that I am passionate about.  We have our fair shair of office politics and typical personality clashes associated with a company full of type-A personalities, but as a whole, I love my job.

This leads me to my current predicament. I am always interested in other jobs and opportunities. Not because I need to be… And I know that in this economy we should just be happy to have ANY job. Still, I find myself looking at other options. Next week I interview for what could be a very interesting opportunity–still working as a medic, but in a smaller hospital/ambulance setting.

So the questions persists, do you love your job? Do you look around?

Do You?

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Follow m3 on Facebook? You should!

It is the easiest way to find out about new posts from MedicThree! Since I couldn’t be any flakier about posting… you need to know!

May God Have Mercy…

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Today,  on the anniversary on one of the worst days in Firefighting history, 2 of Chicago’s Bravest perished during a building collapse. 14 others were injured during the initial collapse and subsequent search efforts.

May God Have Mercy on their Souls. May God Have Mercy.

Timing

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When we got in the cab after loading a particularly odoriferous and rotund body the irony couldn’t have been any stronger…

Apparently I had left the radio on the oldies station, as “Stairway to Heaven” was blaring away…

I’d be lying if I said things like this didn’t make me smile. Since lying is bad, I won’t…

I’m actually still smiling…

Attitude is everything

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Amazing what a change of partners can do. A year ago my job was almost unbearable… today, I love it.

Ok, Love is a really strong word. I like my job though. I don’t have a hard time getting out of bed to do it. Do fakers and drama queens still drive me nuts…. yup.

But the best part is that instead of getting pissed at them… I just screw with them. Fun had at the expense of others is always the best kind.

Amazing how working with someone, a friend mind you, can really make work miserable. When someone else hates their job… it makes it hard for you to even bare going there.

I have a post planned for tomorrow, don’t forget to stop back!

Thanks!

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I am thankful for many, many things…. but just wanted to wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving!

Hope all is well in the EMS blogosphere…  Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you!

“Service”

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Are we “service” professionals? Do you view patients as “customers”?

I work for a corporate system and I am having a hard time wrapping my head around some of corporate nonsense they are using in employee publications as of late.

What do you think of calling “patients” “customers”?

My first impression…. I was under the impression “customers” “bought” things…. not took them for free?

Why you do not NEED an ambulance:

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  • You are running around the house trying to gather your cellphone, charger, makeup, purse, keys, underwear, kitchen sink, and other miscellaneous ”essential”.
  • You continue to cut me off, tell me I’m wrong, and insist that you must have some sort of cancer(unrelated to the 3 pack a day habit you have).
  • Are mad I am not going to carry you to the ambulance after you have been running around the house(up and down stairs, too!).
  • Are made that I will not give you morphine for this mysterious leg pain that just started when we got into the ambulance.

Reasons I don’t care:

  • I only work one day this week.
  • I haven’t listened to anything you’ve said.
  • I’m dreaming of a nap.
  • You smell something like a mix of cigarette smoke, old cheese, and pot roast.

Sincerly,

m3

The Small Things: The dispatch story

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Sucks.

Seriously.  It goes like this:

‘”Code 1, unit 320, 2904 W Todd Ave unit 404 for an unknown problem”

We answer up, respond and arrive on scene. This is a local senior appartment center with 3 buildings, not connected, but the apartment numbers seem as though they are. For instance, 2900 has 100-140, 2904 has 141-200, etc.

We arrive, not paying a lot of of attention the apartment number when pulling up. Go up to the 4th floor, and start the look… noticing the apartments start at 440, not 404…

“Metro, 320″

-”Go ahead 320″

“Metro, there is no Unit 404 in this building. Can you please verify the Street Address and Unit Number”

-”stand by”

After a very long pause…

-”320, the RP called back a few minutes ago and said that she had the address wrong. They are in 2900 W Todd, unit 405″

WAIT. WHAT? They called back a FEW MINUTES AGO and you didn’t feel the need to let me know that I was going to the WRONG damn building and the WRONG damn unit?

Sure, in a geezer village there is little to worry about sending me to the wrong place, short of wasting my and the patient’s time. But what about in other neighborhoods, where I could have started pounding on the door of some find upstanding young hoodlum who thought the popo was coming to get him?

You can give me a bazillion updates including the color of their underwear and what they had for Thanksgiving dinner in 1934, but you can’t even tell me where to to find the lady with the pink zebra thong who had jellied cranberries in 1934?

F U Dispatch.

Dirt Bags…

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While perusing the blog front I was reminded of a few calls… While one I am writing now, the other I will just let Kelly Grayson tell for me….

Often times during those calls, while showing my stern and focused face behind swollen eyes ready to burst with tears, all I really want to do is say a nice health “Fuck You” and flip the bird…

Instead I put my nose down, do my job, and treat those we can. The shit days are when the dirt bag is your patient.

Why it Hurts

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Like a page from a book, dispatch sends us code 3 for a finger amputation. Grumbling as I roll out of bed while dispatch updates us–a 27 year old female at one of the local state-run group homes who intentionally put her hand in a garbage disposal. The grumbling increases. The staff at these facilities leave something to be desired and the patients usually are fine. This has to be an overreaction, doesn’t it?

As we round the corner inside the door, the scene is as expected–practically empty.  One staff member sits with our wheelchair bound patient, everyone else seems to be missing, despite it being meal time. A quick once over leads me to believe there is no amputation, the annoyance sets in.

So I ask my patient “whats going on tonight? How come you did this?” I am completely unprepared for the answers that follow. My patient–a 27 year old paraplegic female who suffers from Bipolar disorder, severe depression, and a gamut of other psychological issues–literally just came from our Behavioral Hospital. The very behavioral hospital she has requested to be transported to several times over the last few weeks due to depression and serious thoughts of suicide.

The story goes like this… as a child she was sexually abused by her father, her brothers, and her uncles. Her father pushed her down a set of stairs leading to a mild Traumatic Brain Injury and complete paralysis from the belly button down.

The state put her back in this home where these ingrates continued to sexually assault, mentally abuse, and psychologically destroy her for the next 9 years.  Finally the father is arrested for assaulting a neighbor’s daughter–when the story comes out again and the state takes her into their custody–only to be bounced from group home to group home, from one mental facility to another and back to the group homes. She has literally begged to be given inpatient treatment and the physicians say she just needs long term counseling. She is unable to do anything for herself–she cannot function without someone pushing her along. Not because she is physically weak, but because she is mentally broken.

She hurts because she has to actually hurt herself to get anyone to listen. I tell her we’ll get her help but she knows what that means. I will take her to yet another hospital where yet another doctor will push her back into the care of undereducated and overworked group home staff. All she wants is to feel safe. She wants to know that she can’t get out and THEY can’t get in–but no one will give this to her.

By the time we arrive at the hospital I know her story. I know enough to know that she needs this help. She knows what she needs, but doesn’t have the resources to do it herself.  As I transfer care I take the doc aside and give him the story. I tell him how I think she is a genuine threat to herself and that her mental anguish is real–not like so many of the calls we go on–the ones that made me grumble as I rolled out of bed. This is the real deal.

– — –

Two months later the tones startle me awake. Code 4, Any unit in position, Cardiac Arrest to an address I am all too familiar with. Dispatch updates with a 28 year old female, unconscious, not breathing, her throat is cut.

My foot reaches the floor. My knuckles are white on the wheel. My partner looks at me and asks me if I’m O.K.  I just drive faster. I walk in, the same deserted scene. The same deafening silence. I look down and know we’re too late. I let out a sigh, turn around and make the call.

I hurt because we failed.


Reality Check

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As usual, the EMS blogosphere has found itself in yet another little tiff. This time Timothy Clemans and Medic22 are in a bit of disagreement about proper use of ALS, among other things.

Timothy seems to believe that ALS skills are wasted on patients that are not in risk of losing life or limb. While Medic22′s way of responding to him might be over the top, I can TOTALLY understand how and why that would happen. See here and here. We all take this pretty damn seriously, so I understand the frustration.

Because I agree with Medic22′s thought process on this, I thought I would chime in a little bit.

If it was up to me I would eliminate prehospital ALS except in cases where ALS care prevents the need for hospital/clinic care and in cases where evidence demonstrates that ALS saves lives. That said, Medic 22 did bring up an excellent point about prehospital pain management.

Is it really that simple? Simply put, I’m out of a job. All of us are. In a systemsign-realitycheck with 11,000 calls a year, we’d be able to pay one medic. Thats it. After the sob story of me being unemployed is over, we’ll address the real issue: why is it that you have to be dying to get compassionate, adequate, respectful care?

If you are sick or injured, but not dying, Timothy is saying that you should only get a taxi ride to the hospital(where you will wait in triage for an hour(or more) and then wait for a nurse to complete an assessment, then a doctor, then maybe get your treatment started).

Are there ALS skills that need to be reviewed? Absolutely, but until you have had to sit in a truck with patients puking their brains out(on your new, shiny boots) you will not understand the validity of our skills that are in between taxi driver and super hero. Pushing Zofran for that nausea not only helped to relieve the discomfort for that patient, it also helped prevent them from further dehydrating themselves (or like a patient a week ago… going into vfib every time she puked… Seriously).

Managing pain in patients is one of the best skill sets we offer(and either the most avoided due to paperwork or most abused by patients).  Allowing grandma some comfort for the 15 mile ride through my Wintry Mid-Western city riddled with potholes and ice chunks is the least I can do after she allowed my whiny ass to stay alive all this time.

I can’t agree more with you! I have been battling this topic for 7 years to no avail. At one point we had our agency MD on board yet the other program MDs in the county voted against it! Again, “nobody ever died of pain” was just one reason. Another was/is the potential abuse issue, especially with fentanyl compounded by the fear ketamine could be stolen off the trucks by youngsters for their Rave parties. Subsequently, our patients receive a proper induction via etomidate but very infrequently the administration of diazepam and morphine post intubation (only a few of us religiously use the agents). What you end up with is a patient who doesn’t remember undergoing paralysis and intubation but wakes up being paralyzed and intubated on a bumpy ride to the hospital.

All this says is that local MDs have zero faith in their medics. If you can’t secure your narcotics, you have no business being in this business. There are dozens of ways to secure them. This is simply an excuse for someone who is afraid to allow their medics the ability to treat.

Medic 22 a dehydrated girl with a low BP and tachycardia needs a line and a fluid blous. That’s ALS. Not an emergency… but something that a paramedic can, and SHOULD do.
Me: what’s the benefit of the prehospital als in that case? if it doesn’t save a life or shorten hospital stay what’s the point
Medic 22: It’s GOOD PATIENT CARE. Its what competent, caring prehospital care providers do.

If the care by paramedics could prevent the need for hospital then I’m all for it. Unfortunately in the case wouldn’t you just be delaying hospital care and doing something just to do it?

First of all, you are assuming we are delaying care. Like I said before:

My scene time consists of a brief primary assessment, possibly a 12 lead and loading the patient where I begin the rest of my treatment–unless the patient absolutely needs other interventions prior to departure. That being said, when I am 15 minutes away from the hospital with someone puking(and further dehydrating themselves) or someone who has moderate wheezes, why shouldn’t I begin treating them?

Again…. It seems that you assume there is some abundance of Life or Limb calls in EMS. Honestly, those exciting calls just don’t come all that much. What we get a lot of is sick baby boomers, indigents, drunks, and people who don’t know any better. Does that mean we shouldn’t treat them while we can?

It is our job to treat patients, and as long as I have time in the back of my truck, I am going to do everything I can to make them more comfortable, happier, and healthier–if at all possible.

The Drive Home

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In EMS there are a few tools we use as coping mechanisms. CISM(Critical Incident Stress Management) is the most common, despite many organizations not having active CISM systems. While I find CISM to be useful, it is rarely deployed for run of the mill EMS calls. Death and Dying is our business, and if we had a CISM meeting(which includes everyone from first responders to ED doctors and Medical Directors) for every death in the field, we would spend more time in meetings that in our trucks.

This leads many of us to find our own personal stress management tools and techniques. Some people vent to coworkers, some people blog… Some people pray, or drink, or work out, or smoke. Me…. I drive home.

Every morning when my shift gets over at 0700 I hope for a partly cloudy sky. This winter has been good to me. With crisp, cool winds, light cloud cover and beautiful sunrises, I have done more call reviews on my drive home, alone with Country Music in the background than any CISM meeting or Jack and Coke could provide me.

I use the 9 mile long, 15 minute drive to go over the night before. By the time I am home, I always feel better than I started. The roads are clear in my direction, everyone headed into the city for work while I head out on my way home. I drive a hilly road straight into the sun and every morning is a great reminder that the cycle keeps going.

People live. People die. In between we can only keep on trying. Finding a tool to review, learn from, and sometimes forget bad shifts is one of the most important things I have done in my short bid in EMS. Without my drive home to a different kind of chaos, I really don’t know what I would do.

Fortunately I don’t have to.

Being an EMS Dad

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I’ve been a paramedic for about 19 months. Not very long, really. My first year was spent working for two teeny tiny services with teeny tiny call volumes. The last seven months with a service that runs right around 10,000 calls a year with 3 trucks covering. Needless to say, I have experienced a lot more in the last 7 months than I did in the year prior to this.

I have been a father for just under a year. 11 months and 7 days, to be exact. As a father I know I will be learning what to do for the rest of my life. My son is amazing and if I didn’t have the amazing wife that I do–well, there isn’t a shot in hell I could do this on my own.

What I didn’t expect was for the lessons EMS would teach me about being a father. The skills I’ve learned since becoming a father are less about medical procedure and more about communication, lessons, and reality.

Reality is the hardest part. Shit happens. Inevitably Asher will get hurt. Inevitably Asher will get sick. Inevitably Asher will make us mad, and I’ll be forced to discipline him. Some how, working in EMS has taught me some skills to be better prepared(or so I am hoping!).

The most surprising skill tune up I’ve gotten while working on the streets came in the form of communication. My communication skills suck. I bottle things up, take them out on those I love, and then don’t understand when they get mad about it. I can be hot tempered, ill mannered, and down right inappropriate. Dealing with frustrating, rude, and down right worthless patients over the last 19 months has taught me that sometimes despite what you think and feel about someone, you have to be able to do your job with self restraint.

Self Restraint. Compassion. Patience. Even now when Asher is so young and innocent, these qualities are getting more fine tuned. After a long night at work, coming home to a screaming baby isn’t easy. Then again, Mrs. MedicThree was home alone with him all night–I don’t imagine me coming home and ignoring them helps her get out the door much either. Before being a medic, father, and husband it was all about me. Now, it rarely is.

Being a medic has taught me how to diffuse situations that could otherwise end badly. Calming a psych patient down, giving stern advice to someone abusing the system, and making sure I am doing so within the bounds of being a Paramedic–and not a judge–is more than a challenge at times. When I first started doing this, I would jump down someones throat for “wasting my time”. Now I understand that sometimes it is easier and better to spend a minute or two trying to figure out(and make the patient) what the hell is going on.

When it comes to life at home, it is more logical to take a breath and treat my family with the respect they deserve. Does this mean I am always cool and calm? Nope. I get stressed. But I like to think that when big things come up I can handle myself–this is something that prior to EMS I’m not sure I could do.

The most unexpected part about being an EMS dad is how being a dad has changed being a medic. Pediatric calls give me a different chill I couldn’t imagine pre-fatherhood. The way I communicate with patients and families has evolved greatly since being married and becoming a father. I spend a little more time trying to make my patients feel better than I did before–most of the time this is done by talking. Sometimes I am a little stern–call it honest–but sometimes that is exactly what the patient needs, and sometimes it is what they want.

Trying to pick and choose the parts of EMS I bring home to my family is the hardest part. Learning how to cope with the realities of my job and the challenges of being a husband and father will continue to be the hardest thing I encounter on a daily basis–but I’m excited for the challenge.

In this line of work it is easy to try and separate your personal and professional lives completely–but it is impossible to succeed. Finding a way to allow them to compliment each other is the key to survival.

Colleague

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colleague (plural colleagues)

Pronunciation: \ˈkä-(ˌ)lēg\

  1. A fellow member of a profession, staff, academic faculty or other organization; anassociate

http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/colleague

The EMS definition of Colleague:

colleague (plural dumb asses)

  1. Another EMS provider who will hang you out to dry in an attempt to make themselves look better and feel smarter
  2. An EMS provider who is burnt out, unprofessional, and condescending to other EMS providers and patients.

Bet you can take a guess how I feel about some of mine…

False Hope.

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As EMS providers, we have a very limited scope of tools to help our patients. We are obligated to follow our protocols and treat was is evident from our assessment. This means your assessment is likely the most powerful tool you have in providing medical care. Ironically our most powerful tool, communication, is often completely forgotten by EMS providers.

The hardest part about our job is being honest with patients and their families. Often times we are present in end of life situations. These are difficult in controlled atmospheres–let alone the seemingly claustrophobic nature of EMS scenes. When a patient is dying we need to be honest with them and their loved ones. We need not be brutally honest, but most certainly we can not allow false hope.

False hope is a natural defense mechanism in the grieving process. Denial. Even as EMS providers we sometimes hold on to false hope in difficult calls to get by–but this is neither practical nor healthy in the end. Allowing and providing for false hope will create more shock when reality strikes. Death is a natural process–not always a pleasant process–but natural none the less.

As providers it is our duty to assist our patients and their families in understanding the reality of their situation. Does this mean saying “you’re going to die”? Not at all. But it does mean being clear that the patient is very ill, and you are doing all you can but 1) they need higher level of care 2) they may not make it to that higher level.

Does this make the process of dying easier? Absolutely not. For patients and their loved ones knowing their impending doom can be equally troubling. But it is still our duty to be truthful with our patients. Where I believe this honesty to provide an important relief to EMS is in the all to difficult cease or withholding of resuscitation talk we find ourselves in during these types of calls. Being honest with a patient and their family gives them more time, possibly only seconds, for reality to sink in.

When termination of resuscitation becomes part of the discussion, patients families are often unprepared. Giving them the truthful answers to questions about the reality of the condition of their loved ones will certainly help them to make the decisions to terminate care when necessary.

How do you handle these difficult moments in patient communication?

Cause…

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I couldn’t have said it any better, I’ll just Let EPIJUNKY do it for me.

We should all follow her lead. I think this is really what we should focus EMS 2.0 on. If we can’t stand up for our patients, what business do we have THINKING for them…

EMS LODD RSS

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loddI’ve always found it important to inform my readers of EMS LODD notices. I use an email alert to do so, but found this wasn’t always easy when I was away from my computer. Thus, I contacted Kris Kaull at ems1.com and asked them to add an RSS feed for their LODD notices. I’ve added it to my site at left, and here are the links you need for them. There is both now an LODD page and and LODD RSS feed.

Share, use, and most importantly thank ems1.com for their help on this. They always seem to have the most up to date notices.

http://www.ems1.com/DutyDeaths/

http://www.ems1.com/ems-rss-feeds/duty-deaths.xml

EMS-ambulance-thx

Unspoken

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Often times on a call, it is what ISN’T said that is most important. As paramedics we are trained to ask a set of questions necessary for assessing our patients, but more often than not, we know the important answers. We know when our patients are sick. We know when they hurt. We know when they can’t breathe. Those things are usually obvious.

The hardest thing we often know without a word spoken… we know when our patients are ready to die. The look–or lack there of–in their eyes, their posture, their sound–they all tell the tale all too well.

no_evilThe trouble is that we are trained to prolong life. Little about our training prepares us for letting allowing watching someone die. We are trained to do everything possible to prolong life–whether that is what the patient wants or what is best for them. We are trained to give drugs, artificially ventilate, pace, defibrillate, and otherwise interfere in the dying process. We are not trained to let people die.

So what do we do when the ultimate time comes? Outside of a DNR most systems won’t allow you to cease rescussitation. My system takes the word of a family member very seriously–outside of suspicious circumstances, we honor the wishes of an immediate family member. We also take the time to educate them on what will happen either way. I find it important to make sure someone knows that even if we get them to the hospital alive, they very well might never wake up.

My job isn’t as cut and dry as most think. I rarely save lives. Most of what I do has little to do with medicine or emergencies. Most of my night is spent dodging drunks or other frequent fliers. In the last 6 weeks my partner and I had 4 or 5 really “exciting” calls. Maybe I’m sick/twisted/strange/gross, but the exciting calls are the ones that make you go “aw shit…”. Most of the time we are running call after call of No Ambulance Needed or PD to Transport. But every so often we actually run a “real” call. Every so often we come across a sick patient.

Every so often that patient has already made up their mind that theypain can’t fight anymore. Who are we to decide otherwise? Does what we do make a difference other than to prolong a life of pain and discomfort? Are we doing harm in interjecting in what is the obvious end of the dying process? Are we causing pain? Obviously we are bound by our protocols/guidelines. Obviously we are bound as medical professionals to follow the medical standard. But at what point are we doing MORE harm?

New Diggs

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Welcome to my new (and hopefully last!) home for medicTHREE.com! I’m sure you see a few changes(ads, banners, fireemsblogs.com stuff), and you might be wondering what happened. Well, I jumped on the train of awesome(not me…) bloggers who have joined fireemsblogs.com’s blogger community. A project of Jems.com, this community is a new concept in fire/ems blogs.

It is an outstanding idea that really ties together a set of blogs that are focusing on the same topics. Without rambling to much, I’d just like to say thanks to my readers and thanks to the fine folks at FireEMSBlogs.com for bringing me on! Check out the features, the other blogs, and let me know what you think. I’m in the middle of a real post!

Godspeed, Friends!